Why doesn't God hear or answer me? Why do I have unanswered prayers?

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Frequently Asked Bible Questions
Why doesn't God hear or answer me? Why do I have unanswered prayers?
Few attitudes are more disheartening and destructive to faith than the feeling that God doesn't hear our prayers, doesn't answer or doesn't care. It is easy to come to such conclusions when God doesn't respond when or how we want.
The apostle Paul was a man who could have concluded that God doesn't listen to people. After all, he urgently pleaded with God to intervene for him in a chronic trial. But God refused to grant Paul's request.
Does this mean Paul lacked faith? Of course not. However, there is a deeper lesson for us in Paul's life of living faith.
When Paul pleaded with God
Notice Paul's account of this trial: "There was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me" (2 Corinthians 12:7-8, New International Version).
What was this trial that tormented Paul? Comments in Paul's writings hint it may have been a problem with his eyes (Galatians 4:13-15; 6:11).
The implication is that Paul fervently asked God to deliver him from the trial, no doubt with fasting and heartfelt prayer (2 Corinthians 11:27). He wanted this hindrance removed so he could continue to spread the gospel effectively and care for the congregations God had raised up.
God's answer to Paul
Paul could have concluded that God had not heard his pleas. But this is not the case. God simply gave Paul a different answer: "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Whether God directly spoke these words to Paul or whether Paul gradually came to this understanding of God's will isn't clear from the Greek wording. What is clear is that Paul came to a deeper spiritual understanding that strengthened his faith and commitment.
Paul came to see that the credit belonged to God and Jesus Christ rather than to himself and that his weakness drew him closer to that source of power and strength. "I am therefore happy to boast of my weaknesses, because then the power of Christ will rest upon me. So I am content with a life of weakness, insult, hardship, persecution, and distress, all for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong" (verses 9-10, Revised English Bible).
Of course, Paul's experiences were not typical of what most modern Christians experience today. Along with his great trials, he also witnessed great miracles and evidence of God's power. Still Paul's "thorn in the flesh" stands as an important spiritual lesson for us. Sometimes when we experience unanswered prayers, God's answer for us is actually "no" or "not yet." God never intended our physical bodies to last forever. He has allotted us an existence of about 70 years (Psalm 90:10). He is far more concerned that we develop righteous character and a trusting relationship with Him that can last for eternity. He wants to resurrect us to eternal life in a glorious, immortal spirit body not subject to weakness, illness and death (1 Corinthians 15:40-44, 50-54).
In the meantime, Paul understood that God in His love will never allow us to fall into trials greater than we can endure. "But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it" (1 Corinthians 10:13, NIV). Sometimes that "way out" is simply the determination to endure the trial, to "stand up under it."
Hearing God's will
Paul was not the only one who learned that living, trusting, abiding faith is more important than physical health and long life. Even Jesus, knowing that He faced a cruel death only hours away, prayed, "O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me" (Matthew 26:39). Jesus loved life and wanted to live as much as any of us. But He acknowledged a greater purpose for this physical life: "Nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done" (Luke 22:42).
Jesus Christ, the perfect example of faith, knew God's will was more important that His.
God knows what is best for us in the long run, even if it may conflict with our short-term wants and desires. As Peter tells us, "[cast] all your care upon Him, for He cares for you" (1 Peter 5:7). Paul says we should be "confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ" (Philippians 1:6). Because God works within us from a broader perspective to build faith and character, He doesn't always answer our prayers in the way we desire.
Some were delivered, some not
The Bible tells us at times "women received their dead raised to life again." But "others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection. Still others had trial of mockings and scourgings, yes, and of chains and imprisonment… And all these, having obtained a good testimony through faith, did not receive the promise, God having provided something better for us, that they should not be made perfect apart from us" (Hebrews 11:35-40).
Even when we have unanswered prayers, know that God does listen. He does not always answer our prayers to our immediate satisfaction and instantly deliver us from our trials. But He will always do what is best for us.

Related Online Resources
When God Doesn't Make SenseWhy doesn't God always answer prayers? Why can it seem that God is ignoring us when we're trapped in the pit of despair? What do we do when God just doesn't seem to make sense?
Why a Loving God Allows Suffering from the booklet Why Does God Allow Suffering?Many people believe that if God is truly the God of love and mercy He would prevent all suffering in the world. Why doesn't God intervene to prevent suffering?

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Why All the Thorns and Thistles?

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Why All the Thorns and Thistles?

By Robert Berendt

Why all the challenges in life? Parents naturally try to make life as easy as possible for their children. But is this really the best approach?
ife is amazing, marvelous and tough. Any living thing is a creation that boggles the mind, and it seems the closer we look, the more wondrous it is that anything actually lives at all! There are so many obstacles and enemies of life.
Humans are born through pain and difficulty. Parents then embark on a lifetime of care, fear and worry about their children. Scratching out a living involves a lot of work, and things continually seem to go wrong. Often our question is, “What next?”
A hard life on the farm
I recall some of the best vacations of my life on my uncle’s farm. There was always work to do, it seemed—and when it was just about completed, something else came up.
When I was a boy, my uncle used plow horses. On a given day anything from a broken horseshoe to a broken harness to some other mishap was common. It was a rare day when we did not need to stop for repairs or for unforeseen circumstances. When all seemed perfect, a neighbor would call and need some help or a piece of machinery would need repairing.
As I think back to those times, I also remember that I thoroughly enjoyed every minute. We learned great lessons with the events of each day. Patience, determination, commitment to a task, not allowing the unexpected to deter us and the pure joy of working—these were among the many lessons that I benefited from.
When a person puts his or her mind to solving problems, he or she benefits in many ways.
I have often wondered why life needs to be as hard as it is. I have also noticed that the present generation, which has largely grown up in the city environment, does not seem to have the same drive toward work and responsibility. At least, that is the way it seems for so many. There are a lot of wonderful young people—don’t get me wrong on that—but somehow there is an overall degree of character that has been diminished.
Opportunities to grow
“Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall” was a song and a theme that I remember. Without troubles we would grow to be self-indulgent, reliant on others and ill prepared to handle life. Troubles are opportunities to grow!
When a person puts his or her mind to solving problems, he or she benefits in many ways. First there are character traits that form. One is determination. Then there is the exercise of the mind in gathering information. From that point we move toward sorting and judging various approaches so that we can make the best possible decisions in solving our problems. We develop abilities in good judgment and ingenuity in this way.
Finally, there is the satisfaction of solving a problem. This leads to greater self-confidence and self-respect. God knew that hard work and “thorns and thistles” (Genesis 3:17-19) would be necessary for mankind to develop the kind of character that would allow God to trust His children-to-be (Romans 8:16-17) to inherit all of His creation. Only then would God trust us with spiritual bodies that never die or grow old, and with the ability to share in His great power (1 Corinthians 15:43-44, 53).
Working on my uncle’s farm and having little jobs to do as a young boy never hurt me. As a matter of fact, that was what made me a responsible adult. It was a job like the daily task of stopping at the home of the Hamilton family in my hometown to empty the ashes from their coal furnace that taught me to be punctual and to fulfill a responsibility. The pay was $5 per month and, for me, that was big money.
Parents hope their children will grow up to be responsible adults, and moms and dads rejoice when they do. There are times, though, when parents fret and worry because children seem to lack the drive and determination needed to succeed. They simply may not have had enough hills to climb or rivers to cross.
Nobody seeks or wants troubles and problems, but thorns and thistles do grow in our lives. In nature, we can marvel at the difficulty of removing such aggravations from a garden or the farmer’s field. No sooner have we done a good job of destroying those bothersome plants than we turn around and there they are again.
A fresh look at thorns and thistles
Perhaps a fresh look at the thorns and thistles of life is warranted. Paul stated that he had learned a positive lesson from all his troubles. He learned to be content no matter his state (Philippians 4:11). Hebrews 5:8 tells us Jesus learned obedience by the things He suffered. Paul also showed concern about the wrong things that careless lives can lead to.
In 1 Timothy 5:13-14 and 2 Thessalonians 3:10-13, Paul encouraged people to work and be responsible. Idleness leads to aimlessness, gossiping and actions that result in a life that is less than full.
Children need challenges in their growing years so that they develop the character needed to fight all the battles they will face during their lifetime.
Children need challenges in their growing years so that they develop the character needed to fight all the battles they will face during their lifetime. Accepting challenges correctly brings about an excitement and zest for life. Life becomes an exhilarating daily experience. Thorns and thistles become instruments for our education, and the Bible explains that “the sleep of a laboring man is sweet” (Ecclesiastes 5:12).
We call God “Father” because He has our best interests at heart. Parents can emulate that kind of love. Some call it tough love. Making sure your children have just the right amount of thorns and thistles is a responsibility that benefits parents as well as children. Let us face our lives with clarity of mind and the expectation of being the better for all that life brings.
Further reading:
For more on the subject of why we face difficulties in this life, please request or download our free booklet Why Does God Allow Suffering?
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